Relevence

Lately, I've been noticing that for a lot of my decision-making process, I've been incorporating one question that has had a hugely positive effect.

"Does it fit in with my intentions/plan?"

I'm really bad at making decisions. Like, really bad. I'll weigh out every option presented to me, and make a mental list of pros and cons. And I'll still have a difficult time deciding. Even if it's just lunch.

This year, I've had to make several *large* decisions, and I have several yet to make before the year closes. Yes, I know it's only mid-June, but 2015 seems to be that type of year for me. Some major decisions have been of the personal nature, and some have been professional. Normally when faced with making a decision, it's about when I've realized that my choices have been logically narrowed down and I'm getting to the "really indecisive stage," I start to freak out a little. The anxiety of "which choice is the best one?" sets in, and I start letting it occupy my mental energy. This anxiety/worry could fill a few hours, days, weeks, or even months. I fear making the wrong choice.

Yes, I've spent months of mental energy needlessly worrying on one decision. It sucks. It shouldn't happen more than once, really, if that.

After speaking with a few of my wise friend/colleagues about one of the major decisions I was to make for this year, one of them asked me what my goal was for the end result of this decision. "What do you want to do with it? Does it fit in with your intention/plan?"

It took me a couple months to really let that sink in to the point where it actually meant anything to me. I'm really tempted by variety. I like to taste test everything. (Buffets are my worst enemy.) So if I have to commit to one thing, I tend to freak out a little about what I'm missing. But once I actually realized the power of that question of "does it fit in with your intention/plan?", life has been a hell of a lot easier for me. I've realized that there are many things out of my control, especially things in the future, and that it's pointless for me to worry about them. Worry does nothing except waste energy and mental space. And it's not good for the soul. Trying to make decisions based on worry is even worse. And worrying about which choice is best...nope.

The next time you're faced with a decision, ask yourself this: Does the option fit in with your intentions/plans? If yes, then proceed. If no, well, then pick something where the answer is yes. Stop worrying about how it will affect things in the future, what may or may not happen if you choose A or B, or especially what others will think about your decision. The decision is yours to make, so make it for yourself.